Old Prop Steve
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How can you improve the odds in the lineout lottery?
Do you find that one of the most frustrating aspects of following the Pirates- or indeed any other team that you might feel passionately about - comes after a simple chance of penalty points is turned down?

Often this is absolutely the right thing to do, depending upon the score at the time and the weather conditions, but so often the kick to touch is followed by a lineout which is either lost or the hooker is penalised for a crooked throw.
It generally drives me and seemingly those sitting around me absolutely nuts.
Last
season the Pirates had their various 'ups and downs' (weak pun intended) but in
fact their general lineout play improved markedly.
We saw much more consistent throwing from Rob Elloway and Darren Dawidiuk and a lot of well-timed jumping from Heino and Ben Gulliver as well as from the back row.
Mark Hewitt had his critics but he clearly did a very good job in this particular area.
One derided and discarded ELV last season was the one where a team did not have to match the opposition numbers at a throw in. Did any coach whether at International or GPL level let alone in National One ever seek to exploit this opportunity in any fundamental or creative way? Indeed was this particular ELV ever given a proper trial? I think not.
Over the years coaches have devised ever more exotic lineout signals, which would have kept those old Bletchley code breakers happily employed for days, but these often seem to confuse their own teams almost as much as the opposition.
Few of us who were at Coventry a few seasons ago could ever forget the sight of nineteen stone Will James being hoisted way up into the blue yonder - only for Peter Ince to hurl the ball unerringly at that troublesome little spot about midway between his navel and his knees!
The loss of any subsequent advantage following a penalty award so frequently also seems to o a little against natural justice. For once it would seem that it is not the Laws but the tactics employed and the referee's latitude which need some more thought.
One of the more eccentric lineout ploys I can recall was many years ago playing for John Gendall's Pirates Third XV at - yes you've guessed it - St. Day. We were winning by about fifty points and poor old St. Day had hardly won a lineout for the entire afternoon. With a brilliant flash of inspired genius their captain then yelled out "This time EVERYBODY jump" which they duly did and all of them bobbed dutifully into the air like a row of self-conscious Morris dancers.
Standing opposite me was a little ginger fellow with very bad teeth who I swear wasn't an inch over five feet high. He gazed up at me and grunted "This is a really stupid ****ing idea mate". Before I could even nod in total agreement he leaped up in the air and landed right on my foot. Needless to say the ball sailed harmlessly over everyone's heads and I then spent the last few minutes hobbling about in a futile attempt to keep up with the play. Oh happy days!
So what sort of things might actually improve a team's performance in this area? Four simple things spring to mind but I am sure there are many others.
Have clear lineout calls which even aged prop forwards can understand. As soon as they are twigged by the opposition then go to a second code and even a third but 'keep it simple stupid'.
Have the best thrower of a rugby ball doing the throwing in. Ignore the custom and practice that it has to be the hooker.
Be more prepared to have cut down four man lineouts. They are not always a good idea but can work well in windy conditions, close to ones own line (where the other four only have to retreat to the try line whereas the opposition have to retreat ten yards) or if you are already losing the lineout battle and want to try something different.
Referees to be a little bit more sympathetic with throw-ins especially after a penalty. For some reason they turn a blind eye to the most blatant crooked feeds into scrums yet can be real nit-pickers when it comes to throw-ins.
What do others think?
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