England Saxons vs Ireland A match report

Standing amongst the very middle class Bath supporters who surround the Rec is often an experience that the weak hearted would do well to shun. To do it only 2 hours after the same middle classes had gotten out of bed at 8 AM on a Sunday to watch a miserable and mind-numbingly dull Scotsman play tennis was even a bit much for this brave soul to bare.

But surely young Mr. Murray would win, Bill Turnbull, king of Middle-class paranoia on his BBC Breakfast show had told them so... And also bring back to life the late Diana Spencer and add £50.000 to the value of their property.

So as the Bath Support gathered around, in a foul mood, many eating what can be described as a bum hole and eyelid pie by the looks of it, I took snaps of Stuart Barnes, former Legend of the Rec pre-recording his shtick for the Sky Cameras.

Typically bilious and warning of Shane Geraghty‘s impetuous nature, Barnes was in his element, wandering up and down the in goal area thinking no doubt of days gone by when a slightly trimmer figure who would dole out thrashings, to Blackheath, Orrell and occasionally Llanelli.

The pre-match atmosphere was not helped one bit with what passes for popular music in this fossilised mausoleum of a rugby venue. ‘Swing low sweet chariot' is of course part of the staple diet of England games yet one cannot help wondering if the version played out over the PA system which featured a banjo folk version with additional cat strangling accompaniment might have been a poor attempt at humour if it is just another example of a club that is hopelessly out of touch.

So to the game, a tight affair between a side which had been together for the best part of a week and another which featured in excess of 300 full international caps for the likes of Marcus Horan, Rory Best, Peter Stringer and Mick O'Driscoll.

It was very obvious to me from the off that this game would be hard hitting, physical and the breakdown area would be massively competitive.  If only some of the supporters around me had realised the same. Oddly enough after recently reading that Bath supporters were mortified at the lack of intelligence and savvy from their side when facing London Irish in ghastly conditions I was quite perturbed by supporters who urged Shane to run it from under his own posts.

There seems to be an impression of Shane that he is a blonde Los Spencer, not the case really but it is fair to say that his strengths do not fit those of England's rather bland and pedestrian game plan. There is a reason why England looked to the prop at fly half last season and it simply that his strengths are exactly what England wants. Kicking, kicking, and kicking. 

Good old England, combining elderly players with insipidness.

Now if someone could have told Barnesy and the rest of the Rec that would have been super. More so if someone could have told the red hot speed king Noah Cato that he's supposed to chase kicks then perhaps the perception of poor kicks would have been lessened.

A kick is only as good as its chase and often when the Saxons backline and back row bothered they were successful, but for large parts of the afternoon many of the players seemed rather uninterested or in the case of the crow nosed Dave Strettle that this game was beneath him.

Many was the time he could be seen on the wing impersonating a tea-pot and then scuttling after a kick, half paced and certainly not with the same vim and vigour he was associated with when he burst onto the scene with Quins.

Rumours abound that a move is on the cards for the young man and Tigers lead the way to garner his signature. An attitude adjustment may well be needed before entering Wellford Road, simply because if body language is anything to go by he will be back in the Championship and playing for Nottingham quicker than he can say ‘Who cleaned out my locker?'

In the centre however was Brad Barriit, one of the Saracens shining lights. Born in South Africa the young centre has a tremendous step and was a constant threat to Barry Murphy and Keith Matthews. Unfortunately England were unwilling to let him and Shane off the leash and give them an opportunity to shine.

Still, winning is critical, being able to play to a game plan is critical and what is most critical is that the post match critical analysis shows they did as they were told and hence cannot be criticized....

Still with me?

The Irish side were wise, street smart and very, very physical. Soon they are to become known as the Irish Wolfhounds, a smart match actually, as they get a smell of blood and are quite relentless. Connacht number 8 John Mulldoon stood out for praise in the opening half, with some heavy hits and a tireless work load; he reminded me of someone who used to play for Ulster...

While Barry Murphy looked to control the game well with several nicely placed punts he struggled to get his backline firing with ball in hand as many passes went awry of their target. Frustrating for a player how is looking to enforce his position as the next Ronan O'Gara.

Tigers scrumhalf dealt an early blow for England as he snuck down the blindside and played in Dave Strettle. One of the few high lights of the opening half but also eminently forgettable as many around thought we were going into half time losing. A slip of the mind of mild dementia from excessive noshing on bum-holes and eyelid pies or perhaps they're too busy moaning at Shane?

But the star of the show yesterday for England was our own Phil Dowson. Far too physical and far too clever for many of his counterparts and with the pace to get around the pitch, his best skill is simple, like Nick Easter when he gets there he makes the right decision. But he gets there much quicker....

Working alongside Dowse was a young man from Worcester, well Coventry originally but crikey, we have snared ourselves a bobby dazzler here...

Tom Wood and Phil Dowson look like becoming the new Morrissey and Marr, no, the new Cannon and Ball, that's not right, the new Lennon and McCartney!  A match made in heaven, rapid fast, and crazy brave but tempered with the kind of smarts that means a thinner penalty count to keep the pressure on the opposition.

Meanwhile Shane continued to struggle to find a foothold in the game but slowly the side began to click together, it's not easy to just throw a side together in a week, especially one which wishes to play so pragmatically and with players unaware of each other's strengths and weaknesses.

But when Paul Doran-Jones was sin-binned it finally gave the Irish a chance to attack the England side who defence had been resolute all day. 
From the ensuing scrum came the breakthrough with Henry going over under posts and making for a tight finish.

However credit must go to England who managed the clock well throughout the sin-binning. Shane seem to take well over the allotted minute whilst attempting a fanciful kick at goal, while even getting the kicking tee on the field seemed to take an age, all the while the clock slowly ticked on and on.

Eventually the game drew to a dreary and humdrum close as Doran-Jones and Tom Wood returned to the field and whilst Ireland looked to have a sniff, England's defence stood firm and lead to a midfield snafu and gave them the chance to clear their lines.

But I hasten to add doesn't agree with it...

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