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aka: Tony Selman Star sign: The Monkey Wrench Favourite fastening: Velcro Hobbies: Mud wrestling; sitting down Biography: Tony was born into a well-to-do family - a fact that can be deduced by his being the only editor currently ensconced in the Vernon stand, where he can be found at most games being pursued by sue_b trying to get her flask of mulled wine back. As a boy, Tony loved the sea and spent 30 years in the Merchant Navy - a career hampered only slightly by chronic sea-sickness. Tony's former crew-mates still talk fondly of the spectacular distance record he set during a particularly nasty squall off the Azores in 1983. Nowadays, Tony leads a sedentary life of quiet contemplation, rousing himself only to offer the referee of the day his sage advice. |
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aka: Graham Douglas Star sign: The Boring Group of Faint Stars Favourite strings: La Bella Super Steps Hobbies: Muttering; loud shirts Biography: Bloodnok was born into a military family: his mother was chief bromide operative at Aldershot NAAFI and his father was a serial deserter from battlefields across Europe. After a childhood, Bloodnok inevitably joined the army in the catering corps, where his extreme cowardice was less of a hindrance. His inability to cook and his general incompetence was somewhat more problematic, though. He rose to the rank of Major by lying about his height before being discharged following an incident involving the head cook and a strawberry blancmange. Can now be found wandering around Edgeley Park quoting Monty Python sketches to anyone who'll listen. |
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aka: Anne Blakeney Star sign: The Hockey Stick Favourite road sign: "Low Bridge" Hobbies: Macrame; bog snorkeling Biography: Seven years as a student and twenty-one years a teacher at St. Trinian's Finishing School for Young Gentle Ladies has left Anne well equipped to appreciate the finer aspects of the game of rugby. She can often be heard offering advice such as "Go on, rip his arm off", "Ah, pop it back in and get on with it, you big Jessie" and "My gels could tackle harder than that". When not watching rugby, Anne spends much of her time practicing for next year's extreme ironing championships. |
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aka: Peter Ding Star sign: The Bent Bugle Favourite Rodent: Capybara Hobbies: Shark wrestling Biography: Peter has never been young. He came into
the world fully-formed and has remained unchanged for the last 500
years. Yes, he is, in fact, an immortal. Only this fact can adequately
explain his astonishing capacity for surviving life-threatening
situations and prodigious quantities of alcohol. Peter has had many
jobs during his lifetime: he carried Stanley's bags during the search
for Livingstone; he was chief bellows operative for the Montgolfier
brothers and was an apple-picker in Isaac Newton's orchard. These days,
when not watching rugby, he spends most of his free time arranging his
toe-nail collection by size and shape. He has never been known to
refuse the offer of a free pint. |
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