By Bath Man
December 5 2004
By Bath Man
Bath American Pie
A long long time ago
I can still remember how that rugby used to make me smile
And I knew if he had a chance
Knuckles could make that back line dance
And maybe we’d be happy for a while.
But February made me shiver
With every injury delivered
Bad news on the doorstep
They couldn't take one more step
I can't remember if I cried
When I read about the injured side
But something touched me deep inside
The team in Blue, Black and White
So
{Refrain}
Bye-bye, relegation dog fight
Take my horn to away games
To give the oppos a fright
And them good old boys drinking cider were tight
Singin' bury me in Blue, Black and White
Did you write the Book of Love
And do you have faith in God above
If Knuckles tells you so
Do you believe in the rolling maul
Can rucking save your mortal soul
And can you teach me how to tackle real low
Well, I know that you're in love with Tinds
'Cause I saw you dancin' in the gym
You both kicked off your shoes
Man, I dig those black, white and blues
I was a lonely teenage loosehead prop
With a cut lip, belly and nowt on top
But I knew I was out of luck
When I tackled the blue, black and white
I started singin'
Bye-bye, relegation dog fight
Take my horn to away games
To give the oppos a fright
And them good old boys drinking cider were tight
Singin' bury me in blue, black and white
Now for ten years we've been out on our own
And praise piles high on Knuckles throne
But that's not how it used to be
For the jester coached like an Aussie queen
And the players played like Torville and Dean
And swear words came from you and me
Oh, and while the Bris were going down
Big Jack gave Knuckles the jester’s crown
The Rec was new adorned
No tickets were returned
And Pezza shouts loud for his Marx’s
The forwards practiced in the park
And we sang c’mon Bath in the dark
Whilst dressed in Blue, Black and White
We were singing
Bye-bye, relegation dog fight
Take my horn to away games
To give the oppos a fright
And them good old boys drinking cider were tight
Singin' bury me in blue, black and white
Helter Skelter in a summer swelter
The Welsh flew off and we signed some belters
Fids, Flats, Dunc and Zak to name a few
The ref called foul out on the grass
The players tried for a forward pass
With the jester on the sidelines having a blast
Now the half-time air was sweet perfume
While the Uni Girls danced to a marching tune
We all got up to dance
Oh, give St. Olly a chance
'Cause the oppos tried to play the field
The Bath tight five refused to yield
Do you recall what was deal
A win to the blue, black and white
We started singing
{Refrain}
Oh, and there was Beastie all over the place
Popping up in lots of Space
Scoring time and time again
So come on, Jack was nimble, Jack was quick
Jack bought well and made them click
Cause winning is the Batch man’s only friend
Oh, and as I watched them on Sky TV
My hands were raised constantly
No Tigger born in hell
Could break that Knuckles spell
And as the fans cheered high into the night
To light the sacrificial rite
I saw Coochie laughing with delight
Dressed in Blue, Black and White
He was singing
{Refrain}
I met a girl who supports les blues
And I asked her for some happy news
But she just cried and turned away
I went down to the sacred store
And bought a shirt like years before
But the man there said that Brendon couldn't play
And in the streets the children screamed
The lovers cried, and the poets dreamed
But not a word was spoken
The Oppo scrum was broken
And the three men I admire most
Knuckles, Smith and Foles the coach
They watch ‘em score under the post
Wearing Blue, Black and White
And they were singing
{Refrain}
They were singing bye-bye, relegation dog fight
Take my horn to away games
To give the oppos a fright
Them good old boys drinking cider were tight
Singin' bury me in Blue, Black and White.
Bath Lost in France
We have lost in France
In the fields the frogs were singing
We have lost in France
But the tie is just beginning
As I stood there in the evening rain
I had a losing feeling I can't explain
We have lost in France, but just
We have lost in France
But without some big guns playing
And the crowd all danced
However next week they’ll be paying
When I looked up on bathrugbyere
I couldn’t believe what I saw there
We have lost in France, but just
Oo la la la oo la la la Dan…
Oo la la la Danielli
We have lost in France
But the wine is overflowing
We have lost in France
But the Rec will soon be glowing
And I looked round for a telephone
To say “We’re gonna smash you at home”
We have lost in France, but just.
Oo lalala oo la la la Dan
Oo la la la oo la la la Danielli
Bath Sound of Silence
Hello Parker , my old Pen
I've come to flirt with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Of a cup we will be keeping,
Unlike the Tiggers whose season is at an end
and still they play
To the sound of silence.
In Edgeley Park, I shout alone
But at the Rec we are at home
'Neath the splendour of Great Pulteney Street,
We beat the oppos up every week
When their backs were split
by the flash of an Olly flight
That split the ****e
And we were never silent
And in the naked light I saw
Insects falling to the floor
Glaws Boys talking without winning,
Saintsmen beaten without grinning,
Tykes making breaks that never scored
And how we roared
To break the sound of silence.
"Fools" said Cooch ,"You do not know
Bad debt like a cancer grows.
Hear my words that I might teach you,
You Brizzlers could learn a thing or two"
But his words like silent raindrops fell,
and down Bris went
To play in the ground of silence
And the people bowed and prayed
To the side that Knuckles made.
And the team flashed out its warning,
By the season it was forming.
And the signs said, Bath are back
and no one will stand in our way
Just like the old days.
No more the sounds of silence.
Bath Bohemian Rhapsody
Is this the real life-
Is this just fantasy-
Top of the Prem-
Is a reality-
Open your eyes
Look up to the skies and see-
A field full of Bath Lads,for you I feel sympathy-
Because wins easy come,losses no,
A little high,little low,
Anyway the wind blows,doesn't really matter to Olly,
To Olly
Lawrence,just killed the ball,
Got a knee against his head,
Pulled the ball back now it’s dead,
Lawrence ,the game had just begun,
But now we've gone and thrown it all away
Lawrence ooo,
You were lucky with your try
Voyce holding back tacklers till you scored
Carry on,carry on,as nothing was seen by White
Too late, no tries have come,
Sends shivers down my spine-
Body's aching all the time,
Goodbye everybody-see you in May
When you Waspie cheats will face the truth-
Lawrence ooo- (any way the wind blows)
You will be destroyed
You will wish you'd never been born at all-
I see a little silhouetto of a man,
In the mush,in the mush did you see Woody go-
Pushing and sniping-looked like fighting to me-
King and Lewsey, King and Lewsey,
King and Lewsey, King and Lewsey
King and Lewsey had to go o o
But I'm just a poor hooker and nobody loves me-
He's just a poor hooker in poor company-
Spare him his life from this monstrosity
Easy come easy go-,will you let me throw-
Leota! No-,we will not let you throw-let him throw-
Leota! We will not let you throw-let him throw
Leota! We will not let you throw-let me throw
Will not let you throw-let me throw
Will not let you throw let me throw
No,no,no,no,no,no,no-
Mummy mummy ,mummy mummy ,mummy mummy let me throw-
Borthwick has a catch put aside for me,for me,for me-
So you think you can beat us with just one try-
Wait till May when your backline will die-
Oh Waspies-I can’t wait till May Waspies-
Just gotta get out-just gotta get out to HQ
Nothing really matters,
Anyone can see,
Nothing really matters-Except beating the cheating Waspies
Any way the wind blows....
Bath Solsbury Hill
Climbing up on Solsbury Hill
After beating the Leeds Tykes
Wind was blowing, time stood still
Relief that Catty played all right
Chris was something to observe
Molly at FB, I heard a voice
Knuckles really has got a nerve
But what a fantastic choice
I did not believe the information
walking up from Bath Spa Station
The kicks going boom boom boom
"Son," he said "Grab your points,
To beat Leeds at home."
The Beast of Bath has re-signed
Playing sweet as a nut
When we have our best back line
Our try line surely will be shut
So we play from game to game
Our team is in a winning rut
Come on Queenies do us proud
Our insect rivals should be cut
Cups are part of our scenery
Knuckles has renewed the machinery
The kicks going boom boom boom
"Hey" he said "Grab your kit
Tykes we are coming to your home
No illusion we are top
Its where we deserve to be
The rest can scrabble for the junk
The prize belongs to Bath Rugby
Watched by ten thou at The Rec
Who week on week victories see
Two fingers up to etiquette
Winning means all to me
Mattie is the best replacement
I'll tell them what the smile on my face meant
The kicks going boom boom boom
"Hey" I said "You can book my place,
HQ is our second home."
Bath And Then he Kissed Me
Well, we went up to Leeds, hoping to progress in the cup.
It was kinda cold, but with Tindall back things were looking up.
We usually win when we keep it tight
We usually win with the forwards might
So why the f*ck did we spread it wide
Where we dropped it.
Each time we attacked, the ball was spilled again.
Ronnie and JC were laughing at their old friends.
Our backs didn't know just what to do
The supporters are travelling home feeling blue
Because every time we spread it wide
We bloody dropped it
We dropped it in ways I have never seen before,
We dropped it in ways I don’t want to see for ever more.
I hope Knuckles busts a vein giving the team a rogering
Drop Crockett to the bench and stick Balshaw on the wing.
Give Catty a kick to focus his game
Tindall shouldn’t play if he is still lame.
You cannot win by spreading it wide
And then dropping it
On Sunday feeling down I switched on the TV
To find out by how many the Wasps had beaten Pertemp Bees.
I laughed out loud when I saw the score
The insects must have played pretty poor
I felt so happy I almost cried
Because they’d dropped it
Bath Deck of Cards
During the 2004 campaign, a bunch of Men of Bath had been on a long hike,
And they arrived in a little town called Gloucester.
The next morning, being Sunday, several of the men went to Church.
The men were silent in Church and after the Chaplain had read the prayer,
The text was taken up next.
Those of the men who had a prayer book took them out,
But this one man had only a deck of cards, and so he spread them out.
The Chaplain saw the cards and said: "Son, put away those cards."
After the services were over,
The Man of Bath was taken prisoner and brought before Shed Heads
The Chief Shed Head said: "Chaplain, why have you brought this man here?"
"For playing cards in church, Sir."
"And what have you to say for yourself, son?"
"Much, Sir," replied the Man of Bath.
The Chief shed head said: "I hope so,
"For, if not, I shall punish you more than any man was ever punished."
The Man of Bath said: "Sir, I had been on the lash for about six days.
"I had neither a ZP Programme nor Cup final ticket,
"But I hope to satisfy you, Sir,
"With the purity of my intentions."
And with that, the boy started his story.
"You see Sir, when I look at the Ace,
"It reminds me that there is but one Lion of the West.
"And the Deuce reminds me that the pitch is divided into two parts,
"The Clubhouse end and the Hamptons.
"When I see the Trey,
"I think of Knuckles, Foles, and the Holy Smith.
"And when I see the Four,
"I think of the four Coaches who went on to coach Internationally;
"There was Jack, Brian, Clive and Robbo
"And when I see the Five,
"It reminds me of the five tight forwards who win us the games;
"There were ten of them: five were wise and were saved; five were Welsh and were
shut out.
"When I see the Six,
"It reminds me that in six weeks, Knuckles made this great Heaven on Earth.
"When I see the Seven,
"It reminds me that in the seventh week, Knuckles rested and the Army took over
"And when I see the Eight,
"I think of the eight Tiggers Zak had for breakfast
"There was far to many to name individually.
"And when I see the Nine,
"I think of the Woody our Savior cleansed, and the Waspies got Voyce (titter, titter.).
"When I see the Ten,
"I think of the Ten game winning moves Catt will hand down to Olly over a pint of
Blackthorn.
"When I see the King,
"It reminds me that the Waspie one only takes on the short, easy kicks, unlike St. Olly
"And when I see the Queen,
"I laugh because Logan really should have hung up his boots by now
"And the Jack is the sainted Rowell of Success.
"When I count the number of spots on a deck of cards, I find three hundred, sixtyfive:
"The number of days in a year that Bath remain at the top.
"There are 52 cards: the number of weeks in a year that Leota misses his jumpers
"There are 4 suits: the number of Refs on the pitch when Dillydally, Howler and
Woody are playing.
"There are 12 picture cards: the number of offsides DillyDally gets away with per
half.
"There are 13 tricks: the number of injuries we have to cope with every week.
"So you see, Sir, my pack of cards serves me as a Team Sheet, a Programme and a
Match day preview."
"And friends, the story is true.
"I know, I was that Bath man."
Bath Molly Malone
In Readings fair city where the rugby is gritty
Twas there that they rue the boot of Malone
As he kicks for position
Through his own volition
Scoring penalties and drop goals alive, alive Oh
Alive, alive oh, alive, alive oh,
Scoring penalties and drop goals alive, alive Oh
Now the back line were strangers, not alive to the dangers
Of Sackey and Hacky and La-La and Po
But the forwards were pillars
It was the backs who were spillers
Keeping London Irish hopes alive, alive Oh
Alive, alive oh, alive, alive oh,
Keeping London Irish hopes alive, alive Oh
Twas the forwards of old, who could be so bold
As to rumble it in with 30 yards to go
No tractor and trailer
To end in a failure
But eight men driving alive, alive Oh
Alive, alive oh, alive, alive oh,
But eight men driving alive, alive Oh
So it comes to the ending, with posts that are bending
And Molly has shown us his class all day long
But Barry is found wanting
And the Bath man is chanting
Our league hopes are still alive, alive Oh
Alive, alive oh, alive, alive oh,
Our league hopes are still alive, alive Oh
Bath Friggin’ in the Riggin’
It was on the good ship Venus
By George ya shoulda seen us
The figurehead was a lady in bed
And the mast a mammoth painted sculptured piece of wood
The captain of this vessel
He was somewhat uncouth
He wasn't fit to move detritus
From one place to another
Chorus:
commiting lewd acts in the riggin'
commiting lewd acts in the riggin'
commiting lewd acts in the riggin'
Coz there's not a lot to keep us entertained
The first mate's name was Morgan
By Jimminy he was an ugly chap
Ten times a day he'd stop and play
With his massive Wurlitzer
The first mate's name was Cooper
By Crikey he was a trooper
He exercised on a daily basis until he was
Quite exhausted
Chorus
The second mate was Andy
By Cripes he was very full of himself and thought himself quite attractive
Till they crushed his appendage on a jagged rock
For ruining the 5 star Courvoisier
The cabin boy was Flipper
He was quite confused hormonally
He managed to secrete pieces of broken glass about his personage
Which caused lacerations to the freenum of the skipper
Chorus
The Captain's wife was Mabel
Who was unable to partake of procreation
So the scallywags on board the ship, attached her mammalian pretruberances
To the cribbage table
The Captain had a daughter
Who fell in deep sea water
And by her squeals we knew the fish in the sea
Had examined her body closely, especially the bits covered with hair
Repeat Chorus to Fade
Bath Olly Flapping Thrice
Flap One
Thanks for the time that you've given me
The memories are all in my mind
And now that we've come to the end of our season
There's something I must say out loud
You're once, twice, three times a flapper
In the Black, White and Blue
Yes, you're once, twice, three times a flapper
And your country needs you
Clive needs you
You've shaded my dreams, my joys, my pains
You've made my life worth living for
And if I had to live my life over again
I'd spend each and every moment watching you
You're once, twice, three times a flapper
In the Black , White and Blue
Yes, you're once, twice, three times a flapper
And your city needs you
Knuckles needs you
When we are together, the moments I cherish
With every beat of my heart
To watch you, to clap you, to cheer you, to praise you
There's no place you can’t kick from
You're once, twice, three times a flapper
In the Balck , White and Blue
You're once, twice, three times a flapper
And Bath Rugby needs you
We all need you
Flap Two
Hey boy what ya doin' down there
Kicking alone every night while the pubs are open
I can hear the Oppos a bayin’
I can see your boot a swayin'
One more kick and three points are ours
I love it
Oh, St Olly
Flap three times before kicking the ball over
Do the thumb thing to concentrate the mind
Oh, St Olly
Look at the posts and then down to your toes
Two steps, kick and over it goes
If you look out your window tonight
You will see that we are still top of the pile
Read how many times we have won
Like in the past we have done
And only in my dreams over the past two years did that occur
Oh, St Olly
Flap three times before kicking the ball over
Do the thumb thing to concentrate the mind
Oh, St Olly
Look at the posts and then down to your toes
Two steps, kick and over it goes
Oh, St. Olly…….
Flap Three
Now there are three flaps to heaven
St Olly does them and you will plainly see.
And as I travel on and things rarely go wrong
Just call it flaps one
two and three
Flap one
The Waspie is offside
Flap two
The ref , for once, is not blind
Flap three
you kick the ball through the uprights
Yeh ! That sure seems like heaven to me.
The formula for heaven's very simple
Just follow the rules and you will see.
And as I travel on and things rarely go wrong
Just call it flaps one
two and three.
Step one……
Bath Pinball Wizard
Ever since I was a young boy,
I've played the oval ball.
From Snow Hill down to Bear flat
I must have played them all.
But I ain't seen nothing like him
In any a ruck or maul
That shaggy haired Ozzie
Sure kicks a mean drop goal
He stands like a statue,
Behind the Bath machine.
Feeling all the tackles
Always playing clean.
He plays by intuition,
The scoreboard counters fall.
That shaggy haired Ozzie
Sure kicks a mean drop goal
He's a drop goal wizard
There has got to be a twist.
A drop goal wizard,
He has rarely missed.
'How do you think he does it?
I don't know!
What makes him so good?'
He ain't got no distractions
Catt and St. Olly are in France,
Don't see the pound signs flashin’
No Saracens advance
Always has a good game
Against the Paddy’s maul
That shaggy haired Ozzie
Sure kicks a mean drop goal
I thought Jonny was
The last minute king.
But I just handed
The injury time crown to him.
Even at the oppos home ground
He can beat the best.
His forwards let him in
And he just does the rest.
He's got crazy kickin’ boots on
Never seen him fall...
That shaggy haired Ozzie
Sure kicks a mean drop goal
Bath Sailing
They are Sale-ing
They are Sale-ing
home again to Edgerlee
With just a bonus point to show for
Their trip to the pretty city
Zak is flying
Zak is flying
flying like a bird 'cross the line
Lippi’s flying, Olly’s resting till the next victims in the line
Can you hear me
can you hear me we will beat all that come in our way.
I am dying to score some tries against the oppos home or away.
Can you hear me
can you hear me I hope we see you at HQ
I am dying to beat the Insects by a score or maybe two
You are Sale-ing
You are Sale-ing home again to Edgerlee
Fairly Northern, fairly pointless, fairly beaten, not like me.
Oh Lord to be near Bath to be free
Oh Lord to be near Bath to be free . . .
Bath I Get A Kick Out Of You
My story is much too sad to be told
It would leave the players from Montferrand cold
David Attoub really is a disgrace
When I'm out on a quiet Satdee, fighting bravely the old enemy
Then I suddenly turn and see
Your boot in my face
Chorus:
I get no kick from champagne
Mere alcohol doesn't thrill me at all
So tell me why should it be true
That I get a kick out of you
Some like the running game from France
I'm sure that if I took even one run
It would bore me terrifically too
But I get a kick out of you
Some like the set piece base
I'm sure that if I missed one scrum
It would bore me terrifically too
But I get a kick out of you
Some like the game of penalties
I'm sure that if I missed even one kick
It would bore me terrifically too
But I get a kick out of you
I get a kick every time I see you standing there before me
I get a kick though it's clear to see, you obviously do not adore me
I get no kick in a maul
Rucking is fine with no kicks at all
Is my idea of nothing to do
But I get a kick out of you
Bath Always Look On The Bright Side of Life
Some grounds in life are wet
They can really make you sweat
And some tries make you swear and curse
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't ground it,the ref will still whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...
And...
...always look on the blue, black and white side
of life...
(Whistle)
Always look on the tight five side
of life...
(Whistle)
If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that is last year we were nearly bottom of the pile
When you're feeling in the dumps
Just think of Brizzle chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle
- that's the thing.
And...always look on the blue, black and white
side of life...
(Whistle)
Come on.
Always look on the tight five side
of life...
(Whistle)
For the play offs are absurd
But Twickers is the final word
You must always face the Waspies
with a bow
Forget about your sin - give the
Ref a nice big grin
Enjoy it - it's your last game
anyhow.
And always look on the blue, black and white side
of death...
(Whistle)
a-Just before Waspies draw their terminal breath...
(Whistle)
Lol’s a piece of sh*t, when you look at it
Howler’s a laugh and Leota's a joke, it's true
You'll see its just a show, people laughin as you go
Just remember, Wasps, the last laugh is on you
And...
Always look on the blue, black and white side
of life...
(Whistle)
Always look on the tight five side
of life...
C'mon Cooch, cheer up
Always look on the blue, black and white side
of life...
Worse things happen at sea you know,or Franklins Gardens as we call it
Always look on the blue, black and white side
of life...
I mean - what have you got to lose?
You know,last year we won nothing
- this year Wasps will win nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing.
Always look on the right side
of life...
Nothing will come from nothing ya know what they say?
Cheer up ya old bugga, c'monBath will give us a grin!
There ya go, see!
Always look on the blue, black and white side of life...
Always look on the blue, black and white side of life...
Bath Bat Out of Hell
The fans are screaming and the horns are howling
Way down at the Rec tonight
There's a man in the shadows with a glint in his eye
And Knuckles shining oh so bright
There's evil in the air and there's thunder in the sky
And a Beast is on the bloodshot streets
Oh and down in the tunnel where the Bathmen are rising
Oh I swear I saw a Glaws man
Down in the gutter
He was starting to moan in the heat
Oh Bath, you're the only thing in this whole world
That's pure and good and right
And wherever you are and wherever you go
We’re gonna be in Blue, Black and White
But I gotta get out
I gotta break it out now
Before the final at HQ
So we gotta make the most of our one day together
When it's over you know
We'll be top of the pile
Like a Catt out of hell
He'll be gone when the morning comes
When the season is over
Like a Catt out of hell he'll be gone gone gone
Like a Catt out of hell he'll be gone when the morning comes
But when the final is done
And the sun goes down
And moonlight's shining through
Pests or Sinners before the gates of HQ
We’ll have the cup and not you
I'm gonna hit the M4 like a battering ram
All the way to Twickenham
When the pack is hot and the back line is hungry
And we're all about to see the light
Nothing ever grows in the rotting old hole
That is Wycombe or Northampton
And our pack really rocks
And our pack really rolls
And we have very rarely lost
And I know that we’re Champs if we don’t win the match
And I know that we’re Champs if we do
As with every other team that we beat in the league
We’re gonna be Champs over you
If we gotta be Champs you know I wanna be Champs
By beating one of you
If we gotta be Champs you know I wanna be Champs
Gotta be Champs you know I wanna be Champs
We are gonna be Champs you know we’re gonna be Champs
By playing on the night
By playing on the night
By playing much better than you
Oh Bath, you're the only thing in this whole world
That's pure and good and right
And wherever you are and wherever you go
We’re gonna be in Blue, Black and White
But I gotta get out
I gotta break it out now
Before the final at HQ
So we gotta make the most of our one day together
When it's over you know
We'll be top of the pile
Like a Catt out of hell
He'll be gone when the morning comes
When the season is over
Like a Catt out of hell he'll be gone gone gone
Like a Catt out of hell he'll be gone when the morning comes
But when the final is done
And the sun goes down
And moonlight's shining through
Pests or Sinners before the gates of HQ
We’ll have the cup and not you
I can see Mike Catt tearing up the turf
Faster than any other back has ever gone
And St. Olly’s still raw but his game is right
No one's gonna stop them now
They’re gonna make their runs
With no ball left for you
And you’ll never see the sudden break until it's way too late
You’ll never see the sudden break till it's way too late
And you’re dying at the bottom of a pile in the Twickers sun
Torn and twisted at the foot of a static ruck
And I think somebody somewhere must be passing the ball
And the last thing you’ll see is Mike Catt
Still scoring
Breaking out of the tackle
And flying away
Like a Catt out of hell
And you’re dying at the bottom of a pile in the Twickers sun
Torn and twisted at the foot of a static ruck
And I think somebody somewhere must be passing the ball
And the last thing you’ll see is Mike Catt
Still scoring
Still scoring
Breaking out of the tackle and flying away
Like a Catt out of hell
Like a Catt out of hell
Like a Catt out of hell
Like a Catt out of hell
Like a Catt out of hell
Bath Estonian National Anthem
Before....
My native land, my joy, delight,
How fair thou art and bright!
And nowhere in the world all round
Can ever such a place be found
So well beloved as I love thee,
My native country dear!
My little cradle stood on thy soil,
Whose blessings case my toil.
With my last breath my thanks to thee,
For true to death I'll ever be,
O worthy, most beloved and fine,
Thou, dearest country mine!
May God in Heaven thee defend,
My best, my dearest land!
May He be guard, may He be shield,
For ever may He bless and wield
O graciously all deeds of thine,
Thou dearest country mine!
and after...
My native Bath, my joy, delight,
How fair thou art and bright!
And nowhere in the world all round
Can ever such rugby be found
So well beloved as I love thee,
My native Bath Rugby dear!
My little Rec stood on borrowed soil,
Whose trustees case my toil.
With my last breath my thanks to Knuckles,
For true to death Zak'll ever be,
O worthy, please be to f*ck off,
Thou, dearest Rec is mine!
May Twickers Goal Line thee defend,
My best, my dearest Pack!
May Pezza be guard, may Tinds be shield,
For ever may Borthers bless and wield
O graciously all deeds of Woody,
Thou dearest Bath Rugby mine!
He Flappeth Thrice
The Lion of the West awoke from slumber
Upon the dawning of a new day
Slowly gathered his senses around him
Shook the two year malaise away
But first a meal to awaken the spirits
Then succour for a hungry heart
Rebuild the team that once were kings
Keen to make a brand new start
The head belongs to Good King Knuckles
A wise and steady hand and fist
He brought around him generals three
That previously were sorely missed
‘I need a pack of valiant hearts’
The Good King roared and so they came
The Beast, Zak and Lipman, Fids and Borthers
Working for each other time and time again
A front row trio second to none
Like a wall they stand impregnable by all
Dunc, Humph and Flatman let none pass
As at every breakdown they secure the ball
And now a rallying call was needed
A focus for the new found heart
Woody, stood up to the plate to be counted
He will play a heroes part
With the forwards set, a dominant pack
Knuckles mind wrestled with the rest
Who could set the fields alight?
Whose shoulders would pass the test?
Lee and Brendon set teams running scared
With pace and power in equal measure
Brasher and Fleckie battled for the cause
And Catts appearance rare, like treasure
Bodies were rebuilt and laid on the line
Tanks on empty but still they fought on
Every name called fronted up to the challenge
Throughout the season that was hard and long
Lionhearted they defeated all thrown at them,
Tigers came and were sent away in shame
Saints and sinners similarly thwarted
Tykes and Queens were shown to be lame
And in all this one name shone out above the rest
A head that was old on shoulders new
A kick, a chase, a pass, a feint
Opposing warriors knew not what he would do
And transgressions were punished every time
From all corners of the battlefield
The look, the hands, the crouch, the kick
No shouts of anger would make him yield
And so the Lion turned to the final battle
The European hordes were waiting there
To regain the crown that once was permanent
And leave the souls of opponents bare
15 Bath men will fight for glory
15 Bath men will stir our souls
15 Bath men will leave us breathless
But one man alone will kick our goals
The air is still, breath held for ever
The pitch baked hard in the unforgiving sun
He flappeth thrice and the ball sails over
Rejoice! Rejoice! The game is won
Bath My Way
And now, the end is near
And so we face the final playoff.
My friends, we'll say it clear,
We think that Lawrence is a Jerkoff.
We’ve played a game that's full.
Using each and every back play;
But more, much more than this,
We did it the Bath way.
Regrets, we've had a few;
Some dodgy passes, bad decisions
We did what we had to do
And saw it through without revision.
Knuckles planned each charted course;
Each careful step towards the tryline,
with more, much more than Bris,
shouting from the byline
Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew
When we all looked for Coochie Coo.
But through it all, when there was doubt,
Knuckles came and snuffed it out.
We faced it all and we stand tall;
And did it the Bath way.
We've loved, We've laughed and cried.
We've had our fill; our share of losing.
And now, as tears subside,
We’ll carry on Wasp-abusing
To think we did all that;
Top the league from Sat to Friday,
And next year we’ll go one more
Doing it the Bath way
For what is this team, what have they got?
Self belief and spirit, hot
Knuckles says the things he truly feels;
And Humph plays till he’s on his knees
The record show we took the blows -
And did it the Bath way!