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An A to Z of CAW

By The Prof
November 8 2006

New visitors to a site can be made to feel like outsiders because of the banter and specific terminology used on it. Message boards in particular can often feel like a closed shop for close friends. We know that there are a lot of people out there who only read the site but don't post, that is fine with us but we would like as many people to contribute - everyone's point of view is equally valid.

The very ethos of this site is to be open and accessible to all Quins fans and visitors from other clubs. With that in mind here is a list of nick names, words and phrases that are often used on this site. If you find something you don't understand that isn't here then send it to us and we will try to explain it and will add it to this list, or if we have forgotten something please send it to us at

You might also want to check out the 'About this site' article or the Geezerpaedia on the Diamond Geezer site.

A | B | C | D | E | F | G | H | I | J | K | L | M | N | O | P | Q | R | S | T | U | V | W | X | Y | Z
A is for...
AG used by our visiting friends from London Irish to describe Guinness after Arthur Guinness
AJ Adrian Jarvis
Aldershot where Quins had their training base, it's now at Roehampton (q.v.)
Ams Harlequin Amateur FC
Ast Aston Croall
B is for...
BC Ben Cohen (Northampton) a favourite of many of the female supporters
Beast, The Academy prop Mark Lambert
Benjy ex-Quins player Ben Gollings now in Australia
Big Bill ex-Quins player Viliame Satala
Bosh ex-Quins player Rory Jenkins
BPA The British Paralympic Association - Quins main charity for the 2003/4 & 2004/5 seasons.
Budgies Newcastle Falcons
Bum Face Will Carling
Burkey ex-Quins player Paul Burke now at Leicester
C is for...
Cameron Cameron Steele - used to be the physio. who wrote the most interesting part of the match day programme and often dropped players in it
CAW ComeAllWithin - this web site, from the lyrics of Quinn the Eskimo (Bob Dylan's song which is often called The Mighty Quinn)
Cheaters/ Cheetahs Leicester - for obvious reasons
Chelsea Luke Sherriff - he studied at Oxford and has long hair just like Chelsea Clinton
Chris O Jones award an award given by us for stories that have been pinched from fans message boards
Codders ex-Quins player Alex Codling now in France
D is for...
Deano Dean Richards Quins' Director of Rugby
Deb Lounge the curtained off area at the south end of the East Stand Bar which is for Debenture holders, it is also open for 2nds home games
Debs Debenture Holders
DG Diamond Geezer - a fan who wears the bright trousers - further information
Dippy Tony Diprose - former player now Academy Coach
Dumb and Dumber Dewi Morris and Stuart Barnes
Dynamite ex-Quins player Dan Luger
E is for...
Evs Mark Evans - our Chief Executive and former Head Coach
F is for...
Farmer Chris former groundsman at The Stoop
Farmer John former groundsman at The Stoop
Farmer Martin former groundsman at The Stoop
Fez Boys/ Fez Heads the equivalent of the Diamond Geezers at Saracens named after their headwear
Flowers the second shirt sponsors Quins had, Flowers shirts are still pretty rare and sought after but not as much as the Red Star shirts
Fortress Geezer the area in the East Stand Bar where the DGs meet - usually between the main entrance and the food bar
Fortress Stoop well we won six straight ZP games at home a couple of seasons ago and something we can hope for
Frodo ex-Quins player Ben Gollings - from his DG Looky-Likey
Fullers Fuller, Smith & Turner - the producers of London Pride (qv)
Fun Bus ex-Quins player Jason Leonard
Future Hope Harlequins A team from Kolkata supported by the charity Future Hope with help from Harlequins and the Richard Langhorn Trust
G is for...
Gav The Orange Gavin Henson - for obvious reasons!
Get Your Hair Cut (GYHC) Sherriff Luke Sherriff - after his once long locks
GITS Geezer International Travel Service - an unofficial and informal group of fans who helped organise travel and accommodation for away games - this role has been taken on by Quinssa (q.v.)
GP Guinness Premiership
Grassy Knoll the area at the back of the car park at the Madejski Stadium, Reading, where we had our pre-game picnic before the successful Shield and PPCC Finals. It's now less grassy and more knolly.
Gutless and Spineless a charge levelled against the players on a previous web site message board, quoted back in our faces by Evs after a spirited display in the 2001 cup-final. Still occasionally used in reference to over-the-top criticisms of players made on the board
H is for...
Harvey, the Invisible Winger The 'stealth' player that we have who cannot be seen by opposition or fan but who our backs seem to like passing the ball to - he hangs wide out all the time but has yet to catch a ball so the pass usually goes into touch. He's the only explanation we have for so many passes into touch this season.
HESM Harley's Evil Step Mum - a boarder who was also the Chairman of the HSC
HLFC Harlequin Ladies FC
Honey Monster ex-Quins player Jon Dawson
HOPA Harlequin Old Players Association
Horned Helmet Melvin - a DG who leads the chanting in the West Stand and who wears a helmet with attached car horns
HQ Twickenham
HSC Harlequins Supporters' Club (now believed to have been disbanded)
HSCC Harlequins Supporters' Club Committee (now believed to have been disbanded)
I is for...
Invisible Man James Hayter - a hooker who was on our books for a while before ever playing because of injury, thankfully he is now back playing again (and visible)
J is for...
JawJaw Matt Dawson - the now retired Northampton/Wasps/England/Lions player because of similarity to a character from Star Wars 1 and for his constant yapping
Jeweller ex-Quins player Rob Jewell
JK John Kingston - the forwards coach
JTH Jordan Turner-Hall - Academy centre, built like a brick out house and still only about 9 years old. Apparently always writes the best 'What I did at the weekend' stories at school but no one believes them!
JW Jonny Wilkinson (Newcastle) - a favourite of many of the female supporters
K is for...
Kidzilla Nickname for ex Quins player Kevin Burke
L is for...
Lander a term of insult to a referee after Lander's astonishingly terrible performance as a touch judge in the Tetley Cup Final 2001
Lexus Stand The New West Stand
Lobster and Champagne obviously the traditional fare of the Quins supporter
Lol Lawrence Dallaglio - a Wasps player (also LBND or DayGlo)
London Pride the holy grail of the East Stand regular drinker
M is for...
Mad Max the announcer & MC
MadStad The Madejski Stadium, Reading - London Irish's ground
ME Mark Evans - our Chief Executive and former Head Coach
Mehrts New signing for 2005 - Andrew Mehrtens
Melody Fakers our favourite post-match band often to be seen playing in the East Stand
Mooro no not Matty Moore but Brian Moore - ex-Quins, England and Lions hooker
Molly Chris Malone
More Later a phrase that was used on a previous Quins fans web site to denote that more information would be added to a story (it usually wasn't)
Mornington Crescent A tube station on the Northern Line and also a game made famous by the Radio 4 programme 'I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue'
MWTM Man with the mike - Mad Max the announcer
N is for...
Nate ex-Quins player Nathan Williams
ND Nunquam Dormio (also Numquam Dormio) - the motto of Harlequins (None Shall Sleep) and also the name of the old newsletter of the Harlequins Supporters' Club
ND Nick Duncombe (Quins and England scrum half who sadly passed away)
ND1 National Division 1
ND9 The symbol on the shirts in memory to Nick Duncombe
NRSA National Rugby Supporters Association
O is for...
Ollie Kohn Lock famous for his huge smile accompanying a win. Has led to phrases like 'feeling a bit Ollie Kohn' - ecstatically happy
Orange One, The Gavin Henson (aka Gav The Orange)
P is for...
Patch, The The Cabbage Patch pub that is very popular after the East Stand Bar shuts, it was renovated and although it isn't quite what it once was it's still a fine boozer - it's closest to the station and the Stoop - try their fab pizzas too.
Pooky Paul Pook - the ex-fitness coach at Quins
PP Pointless posting - generally a non-rugby related posting, often humorous
Pride qv London Pride
PT Paul Turner - former backs coach now at Newport-Gwent Dragons
Pulled off by the management A phrase used to describe substitution
Q is for...
Quinssa The Quins Supporters' Association - the organisation that runs the supporters' coaches, runs events, supports the Academy, amongst other things (for further details see
R is for...
Ratty Chris McCarthy - used to be the Kit Man
Red Star the first shirt sponsors that Quins had - Red Star shirts are rare and sought after - only the 'Harlequins Supporter' and an old player's shirt are more collectable
Reserves the official name of the seconds team
Richard Langhorn ex-Quins & England A player who tragically died during a routine back operation in 1994 - his family set up the Richard Langhorn Trust, Harlequins' official charity - also why the address of The Stoop is Langhorn Drive
RLT The Richard Langhorn Trust
Road Runner A suggested nickname for Ugo Monye, it's never quite caught on though
Roehampton Quins' 2005/6 training base. Directions
Roller Skates Footwear seemingly worn by the pack for much of the early part of the 2001/2 season but thankfully usually seen on opposition teams this season. Phrase coined by JK after Castres and used to explain any sudden backward movement in the set scrum
Roy ex-Quins player Roy Winters now at Bristol
S is for...
Scotty Mike Scott - the team manager
Shaggy ex-Quins player Will Greenwood - from his likeness in Scooby Doo
Sir Jase ex-Quins player Jason Leonard - (wrongly) used to describe him after his MBE
Slems ex-Quins player David Slemen
Sonic Stuart Abbott
Sorry Bristol The apology needed whenever ND1 or relegation are mentioned to appease some West Country fans
Sorry Sharks the apology that has to be used each time we use the name Sale
Spreadbury time unexpected and unexplained additional time at the end of a game, named after the referee Tony Spreadbury
Squeaky Rob Andrew - it used to be because of his reputation as a clean player but is now the noise he makes when whinging to the RFU about everything being against him and Newcastle
STH Season Ticket Holder
Stockers ex-Quins player Nick Greenstock
SWC ex-Quins player Steve White-Cooper - an ex-player who is often to be seen in the bars at The Stoop
T is for...
The T Word/ Talismanic a word that is too often used by the papers to describe ex-player Woody
TC Tony Copsey - our Managing Director
Thing of beauty (TOB) a rolling maul often after a line out - a phrase coined by Scotty (qv)
Thong Award Has superceeded the Chris O Jones Award for poor journalism - the prize of a CAW thong is given to the most cliché riddled and error strewn article about Quins
TMJ The Mighty Julian - Julian Easterbrook (former Chairman of the Harlequins Supporters' Club)
Tofty ex-Quins player Mark Mapletoft who had a pretty poor final season with us, so the shout 'Unlucky Tofty' can be used to greet any terrible kick.
Tommy Paul Turner ex backs coach at Quins
Trews the bright coloured Diamond Geezer trousers
TVS Thames Valley Springboks - an affectionate term for London Irish
U is for...
Ugly car park the Madejski Stadium
V is for...
Vassy Ex Quins player Ian Vass
Vossy Quins captain Andre Vos
W is for...
'We Love You' Burkey ex-Quins player Paul Burke - after the song we sing when he had a successful kick
Whizz-Kidz the charity that Harlequins supported for two years until the 2002/3 season
Will Warner aka SleepyHollow, a previous Chairman of Quinssa
Will's Coaches The old name for the supporters' coaches run by Quinssa
Woodentop Clive Woodward, ex-England and Lions Manager and ex-Quins player
Woody ex-Quins player Keith Wood
Z is for...
Zinzan must go! a regular call a few years back calling for the head of our then head coach Zinzan Brooke, now used in any thread covering a blatantly obvious posting, generally one which has been previously discussed in a recent thread
ZP The Zurich Premiership - the forerunner of the GP


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