Esher Rugby Club – The What, Who and Whereabouts.

Ahead of the ND1 clash between Saints and Esher on their own patch, here is a little bit of research into the club, how to get there, where to eat and drink and what to expect. I’ll leave the proper match preview to someone else but for now, here is the “Rough as a Badgers Backend Guide” to Esher.

Our chum in Moscow would probably call Esher the “Nots” because they are not actually in Esher but in Hersham just along the road. Now, having been unfairly criticised in the national press once before when I was a tad uncomplimentary about Galashiels, I will tread very warily in describing Hersham.  For a start it is “cultured”, being one of the cradles of punk, with local band Sham 69 recording one of their hits about the place.  The chorus of “Hersham Boys” goes:

Hersham boys, Hersham boys
Lace up boots and corduroys
Hersham boys, Hersham boys
They call us the Cockney cowboys. 

So there we have it. Now we know that Hersham has a boot shop anda gentleman’s outfitters and is obviously somewhere near London, although I fear that true Cockneys would struggle to locate it.  There may be some well heeled lace up boot wearers on the western fringes of the town where the mega-wealthy live in very grand houses on the St Georges’ Estate. You will be able to go “Ooooh” and “Aaaah” and “Lucky Blighters” as you drive along Seven Hills Drive from the M25. In fact, let’s have a bit of navigation whilst we are here. 

Leave the M25 at Junction 10, the A3 interchange and follow the signs for London. After 1 mile turn off left to Walton on Thames (A245). This is a shortsection of dual carriageway, so get into the right hand lane and turn right at the next traffic lights into Seven Hills Road (B365). Trundle along here for a bit, doffing your cap at the landed gentry, and then at a mini roundabout, just after the Flagsatff Conference Centre, turn right into Burwood Road.

There are more opportunities for obsequiesness until you arrive at the centre of Hersham. (Beware mobile spoeed cameras) The road becomes Molesey Road as it goes through the centre of the village. Stay on this road and go straight ahead at the roundabout on a dual carriageway onto more bits of Molesey Road. However, if you aren’t a rally driver or a chav, go round the roundabout and take the second exit. It’s still the same Molesey Road but by doing this, you’ll still have your suspension! If you are coming from London, turn off the A3 towards Esher, take the A244 towards Walton on Thames and you’ll get to the same roundabout. Continue along Molesey Road through rather less ostentatious surroundings than St George’s Estate (and most other things on the planet) until you go under the railway line at Hersham Station and Esher RFC is a couple of hundred yards further on the left hand side of the road.

Parking is available for 200 cars but, as a record sell out crowd of 2,500 is expected, you do the arithmetic! You will know when you are at Hersham Station as there will be a collection of tatty looking buses operating the rail replacement service. South West Trains from London Waterloo will get you as far as Surbiton (where you can visit Margot and Gerry Leadbetter) on 16 February and then it’s, “On The Buses” starring Reg Varney. Apparently, this little expedition will take about an hour in total from Waterloo. Esher, where there is a much better selection of hostelries than Hersham is on the same line and will be 10 minutes by bus from Surbiton and about the same to Hersham. 

Talking of food and drink, unless it has been demolished and rebuilt since my visit in the summer, the nearest pub, The Old House at Home, beside the station, is not somehwere to attract my hard earned. “Old”it isn’t, unless 1950 is old and “Home” is an exaggeration to match most politicians’ curriculum vitae. A web guide to Surrey pubs recommends this place if you think that Fosters at £1.50 a pint is all that matters in life and  where being able to have a “fight with a chav or a pikey” is considered the USP!  A little further afield in the centre of Hersham are the Watermans Arms and the Bricklayers Arms (free house) and just south of the rounabout on the dual carriageway is the Barley Mow. Esher town centre has numerous bars and restaurants, even a strange purple edifice on the south side of town which was lambasted by Gordon Ramsay but if travelling by the train / bus combo, beware! Someone stuck Sandown Park racecourse in between the station and the town and it isn’t really walking distance. 

But what about the ground itself I hear you cry! Well there is a green bit in the middle and a low roofed stand along the west side and for the anticipated sell out crowd a temporary 650 seat stand is being erected in what is now known as the Pillar Data Arena. There is a large modern clubhouse at one end of the ground, just by the main entrance and food and drink will be available from there. To get the full sp, I asked a chap I know in “property” who played for the Not Nots and then the Nots to give me some local info. He delegated the job to some bloke at the club who writes: “Hi Jonathan, John Inverdale here...  here's a quick guide to what to do/eat/drink in the area........  The first thing to note about Esher Rugby Club is that it is not in Esher.  Nor is it in Molesey, even though the address of the ground is Molesey Road.  It is in fact in Hersham. As a consequence, while the club has had a reputation as being very well-to-do, in fact its roots are very down-to-earth, situated as it is next door to an industrial estate, somewhere between Walton-on-Thames and Hampton Court.   

For all the success on the field in the past decade which has seen a number of promotions from London Division Two, perhaps the club's finest achievement was being named the friendliest club in the National Leagues.  Esher still runs seven senior sides every week, and has more than 500 mini and junior players each Sunday. 

For those of you coming to the club for the first time, the directions are simple.  Head for Hersham railway station and it's just over the road.   Most visitors will be coming round the dreaded M25, so leave at the A3, take the first exit on the left, and then follow the signs.  If   after ten minutes you haven't found the ground, you are lost. If you're making a day of the away trip, then leave early, and go to Hampton Court, which is less than 10 minutes from the ground. .  Lots of history, which needn't detain us here, but the most magnificent and awe-inspiring  building, and also some great pubs and eateries in the street over the bridge.   Particularly recommended is 'Le Petit Nantais' - a French restaurant (surprisingly) run by a former Stade Francais player, which is decorated by lots of rugby memorabilia.  The food is outstanding, and the wine list extensive and as good as you could want.   Book for lunch, and then ask someone else to drive.   You are spoilt for choice with bars,  but The Bell in East Molesey has really good beer, and there are  plenty of other options in Esher itself,  although the prices might surprise.  If Chelsea aren't playing that weekend, you may well find Joe Cole or John Terry in one of the local hostelries. (Ed – do we know of these people?) 

The club offers the usual food outlets that you'd expect, plus a variety of beers.  Parking is limited at the ground itself - the earlier you get there, the easier it will be - but there is plenty of space in neighbouring streets, which may require a walk of between 2-5 mins.  The grandstand seats close to 1500  but you may choose to watch from the elevated bank that runs down one side, or from the end by the clubhouse, and hence, closest to the bar.” 

What a nice chap! I must buy him a pint of shandy. Thanks John. In addition to Henry VIII’s pad at Hampton Court, other nearby attractions are the Brooklands Circuit Museum, (where you can relive the days when cars were all black and white and drove along at 45 degrees to the horizontal) and Mercedes Benz World, where you can practice gawping prior to the St George’s Estate. Also, nearby at Cobham is the Bus Museum, home of the London Bus Preservation Trust. Definitely one for Connect to take in. Stop yawning Will! 

Enjoy the day and the game at Esher, where this will probably be the biggest attendance in their history. 

 Contact details: Esher Rugby Pillar Data Arena369 Molesey RoadHershamSurrey KT12 3PFOffice/Answerphone: 01932 220295Fax: 01932 254627 e: generalmanager@esherrugby.com

Jonathan Stockham Feb 2008

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