NORTHAMPTON SAINTS VS. LEICESTER TIGERS

GP: Saturday, 10^th January 2009 – 5pm

FRANKLIN’S GARDENS (and on SKY!)

MATCH PREVIEW

Big Brother needs a beating…

A wise man once wrote never drive when you’re angry. So when I read the news earlier this morning about the 5 week ban it seemed unfortunate that this week I’m handed the reins from the editors to do a match preview as our entire news cycle is all about Roger Wilson and Saints once again being screwed over by the RFU disciplinary committee.

As I drove from Liverpool to my home in Trowbridge my frustration began to grow. Like many Saints supporters I found myself a heady mix of frustration and anger. The frustration I’m sorry to say gave way to outbreaks of road rage as a selection of drivers not only chose to drive at 63 miles an hour on clear, gritted, roads but to do so in the fast lane all seemed to bear a striking resemblance to Jeremy Summers, Julian Morris and John Doubleday.

196 miles to think, to get this out of my system, yeah it didn’t really work I’m sorry to say. Cretinous, self-serving windbags! Seems there is one law for the Saints and one for everyone else. Fine, that’s it as far as I’m concerned. Let’s just stop showing up for the judiciary commissions. Let’s just issue a press release that says…

“Yeah, we don’t care. We’re going to play him anyway.”

No one else seems to be playing by the rules so why should we?

Better still let’s show up and plead not guilty, wander into the room and throw a selection of photos of the daughters of the disciplinary committee members in compromising positions with Sharky Robinson. In fact, let’s put Sharky back on staff simply to woo strumpet specifically to get one over on their fathers. Ah, but what if some of these disciplinary committee members have sons? Well, maybe we should rethink making an offer for Danny Cipriani?

Still, with that of my chest, lets talk about the Tigers shall we?

Ahh, Leicester, a city so palpably miserable it makes Nottingham look reasonably good. The hole in the ground where the feckless wonders of the world congregate to pass judgment on the rest of the nations rugby teams. Those who speak don’t know, and those who know, don’t speak. A little reminder there then for the lords and masters of banality that wear some ghastly shade of jade green.

The new ELV’s were supposed to encourage a better stand of exciting rugby. Instead we find the Tigers leading the way in new levels of blandness. They are the flag bearers of mediocrity and nontoxic rugby. For over an hour on Sunday they wandered around Welford Road as a collective gaggle of OAPs waiting for the Post Office to open. They shrugged their collective shoulders and, tutting at each other, muttering, “typical isn’t it?” to one another as time passes by and before you know it Julian White is moaning about his old rheumatic hip.

Inside their own minds they have a God given right to win every game and under previous regimes that may have been half true. But today the leaders are gone, to be replaced by Corry, the 21^st century version of Private Pike and Aaron Mauger, a Kiwi so laid back he is often mistaken for a spare tackle bag in midweek training sessions.

What was the turning point from last week? Butch James. While Lardy was busying himself in embracing his new messiah and trying to manufacture as much of his own home made mayonnaise as he can to wash his newborn love child in at the end of the game, James missed a conversion from a try where the ‘wonderful skills on display’ were only matched by the pitiful discipline in field position and the complete lack of concentration from the tigers who filled the left hand side of the pitch.

James missed a conversion that would have put Bath out of sight; the missed shot at goal put the Bath side on edge and, as is typical on such big occasions, they choked. Tigers simply had to realize the situation, pump up the volume and squeeze. They did and Bath did what comes naturally.

Make no mistake this was a lucky escape. Bath were unable to hold their nerve and Tigers are moving heaven and earth to try and stick as many fingers as they can in the dam. How do they do this? They play it safe, the pass the ball back inside to a lumbering forward. Yawn.  Back and forth back and forth, keep the ball, play it safe, play for a penalty and kick teams to death. Yawn.

Whilst Mr. Meyer has returned home and all kidding aside we all wish him and his family well, there seems that very little has actually changed from the Tigers side that was lead by Lofreda. Style wise there is little difference and while they have replaced a prop at fly half for a lanky fairy boy with a yellow streak longer than the Thames, they are simply getting by on the bear minimum level of ambition and skill.  Still though they seem to believe they have this God given right to win every game.  Even last week Martin Corry, charmless, miserly, witless and ignorant as he is, claimed that he thought the Tigers could go throughout January unbeaten. Speaking with BBC Radio Leicester, the walking talking charisma bypass told them,“It’s a tough ask but I believe we can achieve it.”

The Tiger’s fixtures over the month include not only last weekend’s tough home game with Bath, which I believe is fair to say they sneaked, but also a home game with Benneton Treviso in the Heineken cup. And that’s followed by a trip to the Liberty Stadium to meet the Ospreys. Then there are us, poor old Saints, the little brother that they love to persecute.

Classic Tigers arrogance might mean they’re looking beyond us to the tough European Cup games, both of which are must win games. Why, the Tigers would go into meltdown if they were to miss out on the later stages of the Cup! All that Sky cash going to someone else? They wouldn’t like that…

Meanwhile the Saints I feel are ready to stand up to the specialists in handing out happy slaps and give them the kicking they so richly deserve. Playground bullies often need to be taken down a peg or two and there is no time like the present.

There were times during the Bath match on Sunday and ironically during our draw with Bath last year when the level of rugby was pretty much at test level standard. This weekend we will need to be at our best, sharp minds focused and ready to get the better of the Tigers not just for 40 minutes, but for 90. Not 80, 10 minutes longer than is needed. Bottle up our energy and spirit and let out all our anger and frustration all over the Tigers faces. That extra 10 minutes is the will to win, the will to fight. And in any fight it’s the guy who is willing to die who will win.

Face the fear, face the big brother and know, not feel, not believe but know, as sure as death and taxes that we can and we will defeat the collection of self-righteous narcissistic chocolate ball-bags from Leicester.

SAINTS SIDE…

1 Wee Tam      (When facing the Tigers you need every big hitter you can get. This means 30 minutes of Tiny when White is out on his feet and is the best way to get the very best out of him.)

2 Dylan            (Get in their faces and stay there 24/7 we don’t close, we don’t go to bed, we just sit there and irritate you to the point of insanity)

3 Big Evil          (Best of luck Boris, bet they play Castro at loosehead)

4 Nacho           (Skipper, top boy, knows what it takes to beat the chocolate ballbags)

5 Daisy             (The lads doing a cracking job, looking forward to him putting Kay in his place)

6 Kruger           (Smacking Croft in the mouth early and asking him if he’s had enough yet)

7 Gray              (Going head to head with moody for the 7 shirt in the dirt trackers side for the lions)

8 Easter           (Doing the business since finally getting 100% fit after years of being messed about)

9 Fodes            (Because it’s his turn)

10 Los              (Because Flood is a girl)

11 Monty          (Big game, big game player, a fancy him for the winning try, sneaking up behind the forwards as they come close to the line then taking all the glory, good lad Monty!)

12 JD                (The rock, the hard place)

13 Clarkie        (Los and Clarkie go together like peas and carrots)

14 Digger         (Playing too well to be dropped, simple as that)

15 Boom-boom (Reliability has a name, its Myler)

reps...

16 Shieldsy

17 Tiny

18 Lawesy

19 Hoppers

20 Dicko

21 Mayor

22 BRUCE!

Saints by more points than the Tigers.

Let’s get the better of them. No one comes to FG and pushes us around. Not any more.

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