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With many, many apologies to Rudyard Kipling.......
By Whaley Shark
November 28 2009
Well, we've got to do something to keep this board alive so we can all moan about Wasps, and I am afraid last night's pantomime was just too good a target

If you can lose your head when all about you
Are keeping theirs and staring 'mazed at you,
If you trust yourself when all sane men doubt you,
But make no allowance for their doubting too;
If you can’t wait and must set off for Wales,
Or not being lied about, choose to deal in lies,
Or not being cheated, still give way to cheating,
’Cos you sure don't look too good or talk too wise:

If you are deluded - and make delusion your master;
If you cannot think - and don’t make thought your aim;
If you can meet with Mud, Frost and Disaster
And treat those three impostors just the same;
For you’ll hear the “truth” you've spoken
Twisted by the world to make you look a tool,
And watch the things you gave your life to, mocked,
And discredited, ‘cos you’re taking us for fools:

If you can’t make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can’t force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: Game off!'

If you can’t talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings – and you’ve long lost the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can sway you,
If no men count with you, because you know so much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With pizza slices eaten on the run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be Shaun, my son!

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